Vulnerable

According to me, as a Swede, vulnerable and especially vulnerability is kind of difficult to pronounce. It´s like there´s too many vowels way back in my throat… I have to concentrate hard to get it right. The last days I´ve been concentrating hard, really hard. My first deadline was today and in agreement with my supervisors I have sent my revised project plan to them. I will get my feedback when we meet Thursday afternoon. Yesterday a feeling of fear emerged into my consciousness, fear of showing my weaknesses and flaws to three supervisors that I look up to, respect and admire. A fear that almost paralyzed my intellectual capabilities. A fear which had power of my thoughts and made me feel inferior and fragile. After a sleepless night and hours of brooding I´ve come to the conclusion that in order to improve my academic skills I have to accept the process of uncover myself to my supervisors. There will no longer be any doubts of which level my critical thinking is at. That is the price I have to pay for expose my capacity and abilities. In some ways I´m terrified to show this manifestation of competence (worst case scenario – incompetence) but I also think that I have to embrace the adeptness and just lay myself bare and show my stomach in order to get better. You know, like dogs do, totally unabashed by the position their in. Only, unlike the dogs, I´m utterly embarrassed by my posture. Nevertheless, it is what it is, no harm done – yet – I have to trust my supervisors and I am grateful for their feedback! The response will make me grow and improve. After all I´m here to germinate.

Ambition for the rest of the day: To endeavor a jaunty walk into the sunset!

sunset-1046475_1920

Photos: Pixabay

Increased opportunities

I sense increased opportunities by participating in this iteration of the ONL course. So what´s the secret to sucking me in to engage once again? Opportunities to interact and engage in this amazing community of fabulous, creative and knowledgeable people. Yesterday, when I was casually looking into our Goggle+ community I got inspired by Anita Berlin. She´s made a great post about digital literacies and ended it with a hilarious clip from the Ellen DeGeneres show with title “You posted that on Facebook?“. Ellen is showing pictures from some of the audience Facebook timelines and… oh my goodness – what did they thought of when they published some of the photos? The photos were (I believe) intended for personal amusement but obviously easy to find for those who wanted to. So we really have to think of what we upload to this thing called internet and we need to reflect of how we want to be perceived.

I try to keep my digital identity clean and sober. I do have a weakness for guinea pigs and that has resulted in their own Instagram but apart from that, I don´t think I have any skeleton in the cupboard…

David White (2014) is talking about our motivation to engage and that we have different modes that we use depending of the context we´re in. When we´re in visitor mode, we don’t leave any trace of our-self online, comparing to the residents mode, where we choose to be present with other people.

Last year I started this blog (in residents mode) and I felt then, and still does, that it is scary to write “in public” like this. I see this blog posting, as a challenge and it is a part of a plan for my professional development as a lecturer. I want to reflect, to write down my thoughts and get comments from wise colleagues and by that process and interaction grow and enhance my digital literacies.

References
David White: Visitors and residents (part 1)
David White: Visitors and residents – Credibility (part 2)

Photo: Damn…again by Lisa Brown (CC BY-NC 2.0)

Intended learning outcome

 

This summer I participate in a course about “Academic Teaching” where I am expected to learn how to support the learning of others. The course is given by Malmö university and is an educational part of my personal development plan. The main learning outcome is to describe and justify the academic teaching on a scientific basis and proven experience.
In the assessment I will make a presentation of a design and a plan for teaching. I am expected to describe and justify my choices concerning learning outcomes, assessment and teaching and learning activities in relation to relevant research and proven experience.
The intended learning outcomes for the course are:
  • use teaching and learning activities that are tailored to course content and learning outcomes
  • describe and justify the academic teaching on a scientific basis and proven experience
  • develop different strategies for equal treatment in the meeting with students / participants in heterogeneous groups
  • compile a curriculum that relate to the concept of “constructive alignment”
  • relate their own teaching to national policy documents and the internationalization of higher education

According to my teachers, Mikael and Kristina, I am free to do my presentation just the way I want as long as I can demonstrate and show that I´ve achieved the intended learning outcomes. So, here´s an idea – I will do several blog posts on the different topics.

I think it´s scary to do this – so that is why I do it!

I’m keeping the fearsome spider in the cage and while I am floating away in some kind of weightlessness with only the intended learning outcomes as my navigator I will try to master this task.

References
Malmö university (2016) Academic teaching. Malmö >http://edu.mah.se/sv/Course/HP601A< 2016-08-22.

Photo: Somewhere in a dream by stu mayhew (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0)

Safe bubbles

Yesterday I experienced an adventure. For the first time ever, I had a 5 minutes long presentation in English, at the international conference EDEN. I was invited by Alastair Creelman, who hosted the workshop Collaborative literacy in staff development, to talk about my experiences of being a participant at the ONL course. This is what I said.

 

The workshop focused on virtual mobility and how staff can be prepared for this. Questions like -What barriers are there and how can we overcome them? and -How can we develop collaborative literacy in our staff? were discussed. We used a Padlet as a common pin board. Me and Francisca from Holland, who also participated in the ONL course, attended the workshop via Adobe connect. We had some difficulties to hear what the other participants were saying but it was a fun and challenging experience.

EDEN

One thing that we did hear was a participant who talked about how to prepare colleagues for virtual collaboration by creating safe bubbles. For most of us it is scary to go public, to be judged by others and to dare to take the step out of our comfort zones. Which could be a necessity to experience new things. If the gate to that experience can be opened in a safe and friendly community as the ONL course is I think that is great. I do believe that participation in the ONL course can open up new horizons for lecturers professional world. I hope that some of the participants at the workshop got inspired to try out the next ONL course. It is an experience you don’t want to miss!

Photo: Bubbles by Brandy Hollins (CC BY-ND 2.0)

Realization of an idea

When I´m gone I don´t want you to say… She did not live to see the realization of her dream. Not that I´m planning to leave but you never know so I think I better get on with my dream and try to create a website with the aim to support students and preceptors. After taking a nap this afternoon is suddenly became clear to me of how to tackle the task. As a wise woman I often listen to advice from my senior colleagues but today I choose not to. Paulo Coelho says it wisely:

Dream and don´t ask too many questions, or fear will overcome your feelings“.

So I decided to follow my dream, painfully aware of the challenge. I fear my colleagues thoughts and I am prepared for comments, criticism and even jealousy. Who am I to think that I can create worthwhile content to enhance students and preceptors knowledge and skills regarding to preceptorship? Well…I am! …as an act of defiance against all odds. I get the feeling of fulfillment to give it a go. To try makes me happy and satisfied so I will strive to overcome obstacles and to do my best. I believe in the idea and my gut instinct says me it´s a good one.

Photo: Park Fantasy by skagitrenee (CC BY-NC 2.0)

The fledglings thoughts

If I´m doing this “Digital me-thing” I´m gonna do it to 100%. I´ve just made an investment in a 1 year domain address and I think I found me a name that describes my feeling – The thoughts of a fledgling. Ready or not hear I come…

Photo: Fledgling by USFWSmidwest (CC BY 2.0)

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